If you have ever listened to Sean Hannity or Rush Limbaugh, you know their shtick consists of constantly harping on just a few (mostly negative) issues. As one wag put it, even if you agree with Hannity, tuning into his radio show is a waste of time, since after 30 minutes you have heard everything he has to say; the rest is just ad nauseam repetition. One of these themes is: Liberals are out to destroy the American family.
Those who claim to be Hannity fans would be surprised if they read one of the most insightful recent books on the importance of the family. That book is called The Seventeen Traditions, and was written by the passionate (conservatives would say kooky) liberal advocate (and a bachelor no less!) Ralph Nader.
In a concise volume of reminiscences, Nader relates his childhood growing up in a small Connecticut community under the loving guidance of immigrant Lebanese parents. He divides his memories into seventeen short chapters organized by traditions, including listening, the importance of being together at the evening meal, living frugally, education, discipline, charity, work, patriotism and civic duty. As I read the book, I was immediately struck how the values little Ralph learned from his loving immigrant family so closely mirrored the traditions I learned in a small Cache Valley farming community from my own Mormon parents and a wise grandfather who lived next door.
What was more striking was how Nader demonstrated how these early teachings influenced so much his life’s work. Open discussion and encouragement of independent thinking around the dinner table led to a life of not being afraid to challenge the status quo. Observing parents deeply involved in the civic affairs of a community led to a lifetime of community service. Living with a father and mother who were unafraid to speak their minds led to political involvement. Being raised by parents who taught the habits of self-reliance and frugality led to insights how the expanding American consumer culture was weakening families and usurping the authority of parents. Teachings about fairness and justice and a love of reading led to a lifetime as a muckraker in the true American tradition, defending average Americans against the powerful and the privileged.
One paragraph at the end captures the spirit of the book.
Today, more and more families are farming out their responsibilities – feeding their children and entertaining them, educating and counseling them, providing day care and advice – to commercial service providers. The ‘family industry’ is swiftly becoming a real factor in our economy. And this comes with a price, as more parents lose confidence in their own judgments, in their ability to make decisions without the help of ‘experts’. As corporations deliberately encroach on the parenting of our children, and children spend less personal time with their parents, those all-important traditions are falling by the wayside.
That is a sentiment that could easily have been attributed to President Hinckley.
4 comments:
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I can tell you what "family values" is generally understood to mean :
1. Mom and dad love each other and are married to each other for life
2. Maintaining and furthering the well-being of the children is the most important job the mom and dad have
3. Mom and dad believe in God and attend church and teach their children to do the same
4. Mom and dad do not allow their children to have sex, use drugs, curse or be disrespectful to others
5. Mom and dad are law-abiding
6. Mom stays home to raise the children if it's possible
7. Mom and dad and the children maintain close relationships with extended family, and they also have outside friendships in the community, neighborhood and at church.
I have to agree with you on this.
...even if you agree with Hannity, tuning into his radio show is a waste of time, since after 30 minutes you have heard everything he has to say; the rest is just ad nauseam repetition.
I listen to neither Hannity or Limbaugh because what they say is ad nauseam repetition.
I've been meaning to pick up this book. Thanks for writing about it.
I think that we need to re-examine our ideas of family values as a culture. I like a lot of what Nader has to say, especially about encouraging children to learn to think for themselves.
What is "traditional" is not always just or even healthy. A lot of the traditional stuff is based on ancient gender roles that only work if all the participants are comfortable being assigned a role base on the genitalia they were born with.
For example: I think we can all agree that parental time with children is important. Where we disagree is which parent should provide that. The traditional model says that it is mom. A more liberal model would base it on a balance of both parents, if possible. If not, factors other than gender should determine who's role it will be.
Thanks for bringing this book to my attention. I very much look forward to reading it.
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